Cooking bacon on the DL

Bacon is not one of those things you will find in our house.
But make no mistake, we love it.
I just can't buy it because this strange thing happens... when I cook it, it disappears quickly.
Huh. Weird.
If you, too, have disappearing bacon, follow these easy steps to minimize the risk of losing your Bacon goodness:
1. Wake up substantially earlier than your husband.
2. Put the dog outside.
3. Line a baking sheet with foil, and lay your Bacon on top.
4. Bake in a preheated 350 degree oven until your bacon reaches desired crispiness.
5. Allow bacon to cool. Put in a zip top bag and refrigerate for later use on salads, pizzas, etc.
6. Quickly clean up and start cooking breakfast in an attempt to mask the smell of delicious bacon.